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Thursday, April 14, 2011

How to Deal With (Non-Constructive) Criticism

Posted on 2:32 PM by fbdfbfb

In the 180 Degree Health comments section, I have seen an anonymous commenter who had criticized another commenter named JT. Below, we will use it an guide of how to deal with non-constructive criticism.



Anonymous said: "JT: Your comments regarding nutrition, health and exercise are the most retarded, uneducated, psychological wannabe nonsense ever written. Wake the fuck up..."



JT said: "Maybe you are right!".



That sentence which JT said might be interpreted as insincere. It would be better if JT said "You may have some good points. I am willing to listen to your arguments if you post them here."



JT also said: "Are you able to point out what statements of mine are false, and give a rational explanation why?".



However, this comment might be interpreted as offensive. I do not think it is good to ask a question by saying "are you able to...". Saying "are you able to" implies that anonymous did not have the ability to be more persuasive. I think anonymous did have the ability to be more constructive, but chose not to because anonymous is frustrated that no one would hear what he/she said. Thus, because anonymous felt it would be a waste of time to make a lengthy post since anonymous thought no one would be listening, anonymous made a short and quick comment to JT which sounded rude. Therefore, anonymous made it short to express his frustration with JT. It would be better to say "I am willing to listen to you and take your seriously if you post your reasoning here."



The second clause could also be interpreted as an insult. Telling anonymous to give a "rational explanation" might imply that anonymous is "irrational." Rather than saying "give a rational explanation," it would be better to say "I am patent enough to listen to your ideas even if you made a lengthy comment."



It would be better if JT had let anonymous know that he will be listening so anonymous would have more patience be more argumentative, rather than to criticizing anonymous for being rude. Criticizing anonymous for being rude is counterproductive, since anonymous probably knew it. What we should really do is to let anonymous know that we will be listening, so anonymous would not be frustrated enough to make that comment. And, please, do not say "if you are more polite, then I will respect you more", because it is passive-aggressive.



The main point is to listen to others even if they are negative.



Update 8:34 PM est: Anonymous had posted a new comment:

I don't have time to debate people on the internet but I just had to relieve my frustration when people are giving others so much nonsense. You wanna feel good about eating junk... see a psychologist for approval but stop telling people that it's OK to eat the way u do JT. All of these internet blog responder "expert" discussions are useless. Get a life or stop spreading BS about diets just to make confused people feel better please... Stop advising others based on your personal experience which is biased and utter rubbish ;-]



Disclaimer: I am not anonymous.

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